Dear God
This is the first time I have ever written a suicide note…….well….not counting that one time after I strangled that homeless guy and dumped his body in the lake after I accidentally gave him $20 thinking it was a dollar and he wouldn’t give it back. I didn’t know his name and so I just kind of scrawled a squiggle as his signature at the end of his sad “woe is me” note. I guess bringing that up right now isn’t going to help my cause to get into your Heaven Compound or whatever you’re calling it these days.
So the word is that the world is ending. Fortunately, by the time you read this I will probably be laying on a cold slab in the morgue and not suffering the ordeal of this “end of the world as we know it” business. I mean seriously, who wants that malarkey?
Advertisements
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tagged: Bay Area Brit, blaspheming Brit, British in the Bay Area, Dark humor, Dear God, humor, Matty Stone, satire, The Bay Area Brit |
Thanks Brit…for reminding me that this so called God is omnipresent…or so they say….its gonna feel a little creepy when I rub one out to the picture of that “one” girl on the internet….I guess someone is always watching
If God has a file on you, Joe, you’re in big trouble.
Funny, funny, funny!!
Oh, Sandy, I just hope I made the “Man Behind The Curtain” laugh.
I dont care if he is the all-seeing, just as long as he is not the all-telling.
I think he’s bound by honor, Benzo.